Post Mortem

Archive for December, 2010

Smell The Roses

Monday, December 6th, 2010

DEATH:
Hey there, living people. Welcome to Post Mortem, the fake online talk-radio show where fictional characters talk to me about their books, their Authors, and basically anything they want. I’m your host, Death.

People say that you should take the time to smell the roses. Our guest today on Post Mortem has a thing or two to say about the scents of flowers. The Compulsive Reader says “Along with the lively cast of characters dialogue and mishaps and triumphs with Laurel’s ability, FORGET-HER-NOTS is a wonderful, light read for younger teens.“ The Story Siren calls FORGET-HER-NOTS “a fascinating debut, full of mystery, friendship and flowers.”

Living people, say hello to the star of Amy Brecount White’s debut novel, FORGET-HER-NOTS…Laurel Whelan!

[APPLAUSE]

Hey, Laurel!

LAUREL:
Hi, there …umm, Death.

DEATH:
Tell me about FORGET-HER-NOTS.

LAUREL:
Out of control magical scented flowers. I’m really sensitive to flower scents.

DEATH:
Yeah, I’m sort of sensitive to chrysanthemums and lilies. What’s the worst thing about your situation in the book?

LAUREL:
[COUNTS ON FINGERS] My mom died of cancer about six months ago. All these women are pursuing my dad. I thought going away to my mom’s boarding school would solve everything, but it didn’t. I’m lonely. And on top of all that, I keep getting these really bizarre sensations whenever I’m around flowers.

DEATH:
Bizarre? Such as?

LAUREL:
Tingles, spins, hums, and weird impulses.

DEATH:
I can see where that would be disconcerting. Anything positive about your situation?

LAUREL:

Nobody really knows me at my new school—other than my brainiac cousin, Rose—so I can be whoever. And something’s up with these flowers. Maybe something good. I mean, I feel this power shooting through me, like up my arms and tingly. Weirdness, huh?

DEATH:
Definitely. If you could be anyone, who would it be?

LAUREL:
I’d want to be my dead mom for a day, just to figure out what’s up with all this flower stuff. Did she know about it? She could have mentioned it.

DEATH:
Sure, but that would have been telling. What does a 14-year-old girl with flower power wear these days?

LAUREL:
We have to wear a uniform, which I’ve never done in my life, but it’s kind of a relief to roll out of bed and not have to think. Except some days, guys show up on campus, and I really haven’t figured the whole schedule thing out. I’d almost always rather be in my soccer cleats, shorts and a big T-shirt.

DEATH:
What are you most afraid of?

LAUREL:
I’m most afraid of being alone. But I am. At least sometimes. I don’t know how to move past it. Maybe this flower weirdness will help.

DEATH:
Maaaaaaaybe. What’s one thing about you that no one else knows?

LAUREL:
I miss my Dad, almost as much as I miss my mom. But don’t tell him. He’s cocky enough as it is.

DEATH:
Your secret is safe with me. In FORGET-HER-NOTS, were there any parts of the story where you were like, “Amy, what on earth are you making me do?” Or were you and your Author in sync the entire time?

LAUREL:
I think she pretty much got me. Sometimes she tried to protect me, you know, ’cause my mom had died and all. But we all have to stand up for ourselves.

DEATH:
You do indeed. If you had your way, what would you change about FORGET-HER-NOTS?

LAUREL:
Sometimes I see my mom in dreams, and it feels so warm and lovely. Not enough of that in the book. And I should have a better understanding of the guy world, even though I really don’t. Why’d she have to make me look like such a dork sometimes?

DEATH:
Because Authors believe in tough love. If you could make your Author, Amy Brecount White, do anything, what would it be?

LAUREL:

I know she lost her dad and all too, but couldn’t she have given me a chapter with my mom still around? And I want her to buy a bigger house with a big back garden where I can figure out all this flower stuff. Or maybe she should build a conservatory, so I can get flowers any time I need them. People are always asking me for flowers now.

DEATH:
I bet. Tell me one thing in the real world that you wish you could change.

LAUREL:
I wish everybody could have flowers every day in their lives. We’d all be a lot happier. I mean, now people get all these flowers when they die. What good is that?

DEATH:
Not much, especially when the dude in charge of death is allergic to them. [COUGHS] Anyway. If FORGET-HER-NOTS goes Hollywood, who should play you in the movie?

LAUREL:
I was pretty clueless in the beginning of the book, so I want someone undiscovered who can morph into me.

DEATH:
That can be arranged. If there’s one piece of advice you could give to your fans, what would it be?

LAUREL:
Pay attention to flowers. They can change your life. Really.

DEATH:
Sort of a living feng shui. Neat. Last question: Who’s your favorite Horseman of the Apocalypse?

LAUREL:

Didn’t they play for Notre Dame or something?

DEATH:
[DIES LAUGHING]

Living people, give a big round of applause to the star of Amy Brecount White’s protagonist of FORGET-HER-NOTS…Laurel Whelan!

[APPLAUSE]

No, this isn't Laurel. But it is her Author, Amy Brecount White

You can buy FORGET-HER-NOTS at your favorite local indie, as well as at Amazon and B&N.com. Buy early and buy often.

That’s it for this episode of Post Mortem. Until next time, go thee out unto the world. Rock on.